Since it's the weekend, my uncle was able to spend the day with us. Since he's also the designated driver, this day was dedicated to the (obligatory) visiting of family in this part of the country. Apparently, most of my mom's side of the family has settled out here and i've been getting quite the family history lesson from my aunt R.
Here in Vizag, we're staying with my aunt and uncle (R &R) and my cousin (Si). My aunt R is not only taking care of ammamma (her mother), but also her mother-in-law, downstairs. There has got to be a special crown in heaven for her - i couldn't even pretend to be that amazing - and she does it voluntarily.
Little family background:
My mother's grandfather was the first in their family to become a Christian. Due to the stigma back then, when his wife found out, she committed suicide; they had 1 son and 2 daughters. My great grandfather later married the woman who would become my great grandmother...they also had 1 son and 2 daughters. Even though the kids were siblings, they were only half siblings, i.e. they don't share the same blood...so, the "half" cousins are able to marry each other.
Two of my mom's sisters (the oldest and the youngest) married their "cousins" - they all have the same grandfather, but different grandmothers. My aunt R's mother-in-law is also her aunt, my ammamma's brother's wife (my grand uncle's wife)...and therefore, we had to visit her. After "grand aunt", it was uncle R's older brother, who lived a couple houses down.
After a short visit with them, we headed over to my cousin's uni to grab lunch...but the campus was on holiday and only a couple of the "cafe's" we're open. We didn't care by then, w were hungry. The college students went a little gaga over our kids and were taking pictures of them with their mobiles. Only after the fact did we think to ask them not to post the pics online...oops. So, you might see our kids on a facebook (not ours) near you...
Next stop was another aunt's house. They live pretty close to the uni and are my mom's cousin on her dad's side...mom's dad's sister and her son's family. This grand aunt is 98 years old and the last time she saw me, i was 1. She even remembered my name...that's pretty impressive. Must be a shock - the next time she sees me, i'm with my husband, daughter and son...who's older than i was when she last saw me. The house they live in boasts a beautiful garden with the biggest, prettiest pink hibiscus you've ever seen. They were beyond gorgeous. I wish i'd taken a picture of the whole tree...hmm...maybe i can get my cousin go to back and get a couple snaps for me. I was more enamored with their garden than with my aunt. Ehh...how many grand aunt's can you care about.
Next stop was another aunt's house. They live pretty close to the uni and are my mom's cousin on her dad's side...mom's dad's sister and her son's family. This grand aunt is 98 years old and the last time she saw me, i was 1. She even remembered my name...that's pretty impressive. Must be a shock - the next time she sees me, i'm with my husband, daughter and son...who's older than i was when she last saw me. The house they live in boasts a beautiful garden with the biggest, prettiest pink hibiscus you've ever seen. They were beyond gorgeous. I wish i'd taken a picture of the whole tree...hmm...maybe i can get my cousin go to back and get a couple snaps for me. I was more enamored with their garden than with my aunt. Ehh...how many grand aunt's can you care about.
Now i know why my cousin chose to attend this uni, i would too, if i'd know what was less than a 1/4 mile away - the ocean!!! (Bay of Bengal). Are you kidding me...all i got was a prison and a corn field 1/4 mile from my college...man, i was so gypped. On our breaks we went to Taco Bell or Wal-Mart...they get to go to the beach!!! So not fair! Well, that's what we did - we went to the beach. The water was unbelieveably warm and the shore was swarming with college kids. The kids had loads of fun and got drenched (as expected) and covered with sand. It's so sad to see a marvelous beach like this buried under garbage...why can't people take pride at least in special spots. We couldn't stay too long as we had more relatives to visit and meetings to attend...well, just my uncle. On our way back to the car, B saw a horse and was able to get a ride...she was thrilled! Both kids are absolutely worn out...yeah! it'll make bed time a whole lot easier.
Next stop another grand aunt and son's family. This is my ammamma's younger sister and surprisingly i remember her son. I even remember him being one of the uncle's that i liked... man, all these family connections are making sense to me now. I'm going to put together a little family tree, so i can remember people and places...who knows when we'll be doing one of these reunion tours again. And i want something my kids can look at as part of their heritage - sordid as some of it might be.
My aunt (mom's sister) married a widower with four daughters. The oldest of the daughters was our last stop today. She lives here with her husband and two daughters and our visit to her was purely out of love for my aunt. None of us (my aunt's side of the family) like these daughters and can just tolerate the husband, but since they're now her daughters, we have to respect that. If i'd known this was who we were visiting, i'd have stayed downstairs with my uncle. This was like pulling teeth for us...she has been the source of grief to a beloved aunt, who continues to love her. Even though India has "progressed" in many ways, it is still a very patriarchal society, where a woman is nothing without a man. This marriage would not have happened otherwise. And we would not have been associated at all with this woman that we had to visit. Grrr....obligations for love
Well, we're pooped! But we're sand free, clean, fed and the kids are fast asleep. All in all, a good day
