We dressed to go to a betrothal ceremony for Mom's cousin's son and his fiancé. It was outdoors. Festive marigolds, jasmine, and balloons half-dipped in psychedelic paint decorated the stage. The audience was coverd by a large, colorful, worn, quilted cloth held up by large sticks cut from trees. Several men, including Dad and Uncle Mamaya, took turns making speeches, reading the Bible, praying, and singing. Some present were Hindus, who didn't pay much attention. Many of them were colleagues of the bride-and-groom-to-be. Not as many family members were present as they wished, which made our presence all the more meaningful to them. The entire service was conducted in Telugu. The families of the groom gave gifts to the bride's family. Rings were exchanged. The bride and groom were stoic for the most part, but after the service, they seemed more loose. We went up to the stage later and congratulated them. There were plates of flower petals on chairs next to them. People would sprinkle them on the bride and groom's heads as they congratulated them.
For the first time, I felt I hit a wall culturally. I felt stifled by the traditions and expectations on me as a foreigner, American, and member of an Indian family. It's one thing to be a foreign observer, tourist, even aid worker. But having intimate connections with a family via marriage brings about new challenges I'd never anticipated. I felt too restricted, too nagged, overwhelmed by what's considered proper and improper in India. India seems more restrictive in allowing social and casual self-expression than the U.S. Expression in media (which India and the U.S. are about par) is one thing --- social interactions are another. Maybe it's still early and my education into this side of culture is at pre-school level. I also acknowledge my history of bucking, questioning, and challenging the traditions and cultures I grew up with (American, Asian, Christian). Doing so as a newcomer to a more rigid (or at least seemingly so) culture like India's is not as easy. I sometimes wonder if those close to me in India grow weary of hearing my questions about things that may be more obvious to them. So rather than try to do the "right" thing culturally, I felt for the moment it was easier to take the path of least resistance and say/do nothing or as little as possible, to avoid doing the "wrong" thing. However, I risk alienating myself or coming across as cold, impolite, and unfriendly. "L" and I had a good talk about this and cleared up some misunderstandings.
The "city cab" was a bit hard to come by, apparently because many taxi drivers are Muslim and are taking the day off for Eid-Mubarak. Also, many Muslims are taking what taxis are left for the celebration, further diminishing the supply.
Beggars are all around the streets, knocking on car windows asking for money or something to eat. Two little girls saw a half-drank bottle of Coke I had and excitedly motioned how they wanted it. I opened the window and handed it to them. They immediately snatched it and drank it together greedily.
